Sometimes it is as radical as changing jobs, moving away or perhaps changing a love interest. But if you ignore the quiet whispering of your heart, you are ignoring your inner directional system.

And here’s what I now know about ignoring that impulse, nudge or whisper.  One way or another, you’ll have to look at whatever it is, willingly or unwillingly. An event will happen that will thrust you into the deep end of your life to look at the hidden resistance.

The part of you that is blinded to the truth in your life: the good, bad and ugly truth.

We are all here to grow and learn and move closer to the source or God.  I am not talking religion, but spirituality and spirit.

I love Oprah’s new show, "Super Soul Sunday."  On the most recent episode, I watched
“What Delights Rainn Wilson, “ Rainn Wilson portrays Dwight Schrute on NBC's "The Office’s.

Rainn Wilson is the creator of Soul Pancake, where he is trying to figure out what it is like to be human.

What it is like to be human?

I was struck by Rainn Wilson’s knowledge about the concept of Oneness. Oneness is knowing we are all one together and finding out what it is like to be human.

Take it one step further. If you do something to another person, in fact, you are doing it to yourself and the whole of humanity. We are moving closer together and need to feel that heart connection. Know if you cheat, lie, steal or deliberately set your intention outside of your integrity, then you are doing that to yourself and everyone else.

We are now in the weeks leading up to the celebration of that May day that will not be mentioned, as well as the June date that will not be spoken about.  Let me share a story about a friend who was viciously criticizing her own body. She told me her legs were too big her stomach was flabby and she was fat. I actually got very upset with her because I wouldn’t allow someone else to speak about her in that manner and certainly was not going to allow her to talk so badly about herself.

While I was going through infertility, my internal dialogue was very negative about myself: my mind, body and soul. We are all figuring out what it is like to be human -- like Rain Wilson is trying to do through his movie.

So while we are all doing that together, let’s be kind to others and ourselves.

I preach the gospel of feeling and releasing, and feeling and learning about yourself.  In one of my favorite segments of "Soul Pancake, " which was filmed in a park, they had people write their problems on a balloon and then pop the balloon, and, their problems!

So pop away my beautiful fellow humans. Do you have an insight about us being human that you’d like to share on my Facebook page? Please do so!

Great blessing!

Pop your problems or emotions during the May day (that will not be mentioned) and the June date (that will not be spoken about).

You know those moments when you want to hit yourself in the forehead and say, “Man, I wish I had thought of this before?”

My intention is to help create a “moment” of clarity around your creative energy. After all, creation of any kind begins within by seeing your dream’s manifestations come true.

As defined by Wikipedia… Awareness is the state or ability to perceive, to feel, or to be conscious of events, objects or sensory patterns. In this level of consciousness, sense data can be confirmed by an observer without necessarily implying understanding. More broadly, it is the state or quality of being aware of something. In biological psychology, awareness is defined as a human's or an animal's perception and cognitive reaction to a condition or event.

In previous years, my focus has been on bringing global awareness to the plight of women and couples experiencing fertility challenges. But despite the strides in global awareness, I still feel there is a need to inform others about what truly happens when the mechanics of creating a child doesn’t work out. In my experience, it is truly about self- awareness. I was so proud of the infertility community when we celebrated National Infertility Awareness Week in April.

How do you feel right now and ask the question what do I need today?

One sure way to open up all your senses to became aware or fully awake to yourself and your dreams is to listen and go within.

I would like to speak directly to women about their God given Divine Feminine wisdom so that they can re-connect and reacquaint themselves to their divine power, both masculine and feminine. This power seems to become out of balance during the trials and tribulations of the fertility process occurring outside of the bedroom.

So please take this time as a gift to yourself by spending just five minutes each day listening to your heart about what is on your mind. Creating a heart-mind connection is needed to move forward.

Shifting the process to create your family from the desired outcome, which let me reassure you will come at the end of this, and towards what you are learning about yourself, opens up so many more possibilities.

Here’s what I know about the women with whom I have been blessed to walk.

You are amazingly strong, you are resilient, you are powerful, and you are insightful and organized. You are resourceful, you educate yourself and you are loved and supported beyond this experience. Oh yah, don’t get between a fertility challenged woman and her dream of being a mom because you will not be able to stand that wrath!

My wish for you this week and every week is to be aware, to be at peace and to be blessed!

Now rock it! At the end of the seven days you have set aside for yourself, your forehead will hurt because of all the V-8 moment slaps!

With all the external forces of how we should look, act and be in this world, we have lost our inner connection to ourSELF, which in turn has created a disconnect to our fellow sisters on earth…

Wow! You might be saying that’s not gonna get me pregnant lady!!! But in reality it will.

I remember receiving my first box of drugs for my initial IVF cycle. The box came all nicely organized and ready to use (thanks to Village Fertility Pharmacy). I opened the box and had a rush of emotions.

I just wasn’t ready. I was tired or perhaps exhausted emotionally and physically. My doctor and my former husband were insistent that I move forward with the IVF because of our “situation,” but I could hear the inner whisper. “Not now, not yet….rest and be whole again,” it seemed to say.

So I did. Feeling on one hand that I was crazy and wasting time… must move forward, must do something.

What I know now that I wish I knew then: doing nothing is doing something… sometimes the most important something.

Going within gives you clarity, strength and inner soul connection.

Asking yourself each and every day: “What do I need today?” is a way of helping your inner voice become louder and louder. Couple that daily with the affirmation “I love and accept myself” allows you to fill yourself up first and then fill others.

So that when you are a mom, and you will be, you will know who you are in order to help your children become who they are meant to be!

God Bless! Kristen

W=WOMEN'S INNER WISDOM~ CREATE A HABIT TO LISTEN WITHIN.

Watch the video explanation.

Which will bring us to the “A” in NIAW!!! (National Infertility Awareness Week) Give me an “N”; Give me an “I” Give me an “A”!

Acceptance brings awareness for healing.

So, we talked about the “I” in NIAW as investigating one’s feelings… greater acceptance of where we are and what we have been through and how what today brings keeps us in the present.

I have found that when we allow our mind to wonder down the road to tomorrow… we create fear and anxiety. What you are doing right this moment is what matters in maintaining a sense of gratitude.

Acceptance is finding the flicker of gratitude in the moment and holding it. I remember after losing my first pregnancy, which was ectopic, and I wanted to curl up and die right in the hospital room. The one gift that keep me moving forward was my gratitude for all the people who stayed late in the night before Thanksgiving and saved my life because I was internally bleeding. How ironic on the night before the day of giving thanks that I was in one of my darkest fogs and it was the act of holding gratitude that allowed me to feel and heal.

Acceptance brings forth awareness, which brings forth clarity, which brings forth healing which brings forth your dreams….

NIAW!
So yesterday we reinterpreted “N” in NIAW (National Infertility Awarenses Week) to mean Never alone… Did you say your mantra? “I am loved and supported beyond measure”?

Today let’s look at the “I” in NIAW. Often we say things internally that we would never utter out loud. And we would never allow someone to speak those exact same words about a best friend to our face . However, internally we give ourselves permission to belittle ourselves.

The other day a great friend of mine was going on about herself. She was being self- deprecating about her body and how she needs to diet, She was so upset with how she looked and on and on it went…

Society allows us the act of self-sabotage. During my fertility challenges, I became so angry with my body for failing to get pregnant and then for not being able to stay pregnant.

What I know now that I wish I knew then, is that we are not our feelings. A feeling is an emotion and our emotions change as rapidly as we can think. So if you are frustrated at another month of looking at a negative pregnancy test, remember, it is only a feeling. Know that it is okay to feel frustration, sadness, upset, depression and rage.

What is detrimental is to let yourself become those feelings.

So, what awareness do you bring to your feelings and how do you greet them? Do you welcome your feelings in and say “yah man! I’m really stinking mad right now!” or do you hold them in and let them fester? Instead, try to push them down.

Feeling and releasing! State your feelings out loud, write them down, scream them out the window… How do you acknowledge your feelings?

Today’s mantra “I love and accept myself.”

Kristen explains the meaning of "I" in NIAW in this video. Enjoy!

Watch my video explanation if you would rather watch then read.

It’s National Infertility Awareness Week, NIAW for short, which is one of the infertility community’s most important commemorative occasions. It’s a week devoted to bringing awareness about this medical condition to the public and elected officials, as well as to help those on the journey find greater self- awareness. To facilitate the latter, we’re bringing our own interpretation to these four letters: NIAW.

Let’s start with the “N. “ For us, “N” represents “Never alone.”

Are you feeling isolated, sad, alone and just plain angry because of your infertility? Or perhaps you’re experiencing the very common feeling of having thoughts that you’ve done something wrong?

Ifs, shoulds and woulds might be swirling around in your mind and cause your heart, body and soul to be disconnected.

Here’s what I know now that I wish I knew then… you’re never alone in this journey. Even on the darkest day, seen and unseen angels are supporting you.

The seen angels might possibly be your spouse, your nursing team and doctors and family and friends… but the feelings of isolation and longing create a fog that might blind you to seeing this unlimited support.

So as we begin NIAW, let us hold the sacred space of connection.

Try this mantra to help you stay connected to this energy of oneness in mind, body and soul:
“I am loved and supported beyond measure.”

Try this all week!!

Get ready for the “I” tomorrow!

Has Your Sexy Siren Gone on Vacation?

Get her back quickly with these three tips!

Would you like more intimacy and sensual pleasure the next time you’re ready to share the love with your darling man? Then try these three tips to bring your Sexy Siren back. They’ll have you feeling passionate and desirable fast!

• Buy some gorgeous, sexy lingerie to show yourself how sensuous you really are. (Sexy is a state of mind, not body… your man is not looking at your thighs and derriere the same way you do. He’ll be thrilled to have those delicious limbs wrapped around him … dimples and all!)

• While listening to your favorite sexy, romantic music, take a hot shower or bath… cream on lots of lotion and spritz your body with perfume.  Then set the bedroom with lit candles, lowered lights, romantic music and other supporting products for your intimate moment. 

• Move your body slowly and sensuously to the music… allow yourself to be sexy…  feel your body responding…  and watch as your Sexy  Siren swirls to the surface.  Begin stroking yourself lightly… tracing your erogenous zones with your fingertips… first with your eyes closed… then look right into your darling’s eyes with a slight smile on your face. Seeing the passion in his eyes from watching you get tuned in and turned on will spark your passion, too.

Need a little more inspiration? Or feeling a little shy about asking for what you want? It’s OK!  Grab a copy of your favorite volume of bedtime stories for adults...  and start sharing which scenes turn you on.  Read out loud or just point...  because in the bedroom, men are really good at taking directions!

For more tips, tools and resources for increasing intimacy, sensuality and sexual excitement, visit Bring Back Desire – your daily destination for sensual pleasure.

So on this year’s day light savings day, I was helping out at a great friend’s baby shower.  DON’T STOP READING!  PLEASE STAY WITH ME, OK?

This baby shower was a day of celebration of my friend’s and her husband’s pregnancy with twins. no less, after overcoming so much adversity to arrive at this celebratory “spring ahead day.”

She is one of us. One of the strong, powerful, faith-filled, and surrendering women who withstood the process of creating her family outside of the intimacy and privacy of her own home and brought the act of creation to the medical helpmates.

I traveled along side her for years, when feelings of failure, heartbreak and disappointment challenged her faith and also brought me back to moments of questioning.

Then it happened again. The natural cycle of life came around again with, the shifting in emotions and energy.

The promise, once again, that hope is eternal and the cycle of life from prosperity to adversity and adversity to prosperity will follow each other as springs follows winter.  Cold followed by warmth, darkness by light and the process to conceive to conceiving.

Robert Ohotto, the author of Fate into Destiny and a radio show host, shared his thoughts about how we make our pain sacred. How do we hold the space that allows us to see that through the adversity there is light and a lesson that will carry us forward?  How do we hold the prosperity and share it with others through shining our light for all and learning to bring the sacred lessons from despair to faith?

We do this by simply acknowledging that we are both the dark and light and we need both.  We need both: the winter to retreat and learn from and the spring to shine and share.

I promise you that the lessons of compassion, love, gratitude, acceptance and fortitude we learn through our “non traditional” ways of creating our families and our lives are needed for ourselves and for the whole.

So, hope springs eternal because we are wired to be hopeful, loving, and unlimited in our being for eternity.

Here’s an affirmation for the month: “ I am loved and supported fully.”

God Bless!

Kristen

You set off to do something and in mid effort you find you have forgotten where you were going in such a hurry, but in your mind you knew it was an intrical part of getting everyone out the door to their prospective places. Total lack of recall.

So there I stood, wet hair in a towel, bathrobe partially closed, laundry basket on my hip staring into space. Lost.

My son, an X- Box gamer at 13 years old was in the middle of the morning madness and while saving his latest round on his sky rim game said something to the effect, "I like how you can revert to the last save in the game if you don't like your last round."

Revert to the last save. What if we could do just that in the moments of blankness? Revert. Get back to where you started from. Get a do over. Continue

The March daylight savings calling in the spirit of spring and renew offers another go around, perhaps not the laundry basket on the hip go around but the rebirthing of self go around.

The offerings of a new beginning in the creative cycle, here’s a thought or insight we always have a revert to last save option if that is your choice. But what about moving forward know that divine guidance will bring peace to what ever place you find yourself…. Even if it is with wet hair and a laundry basket on your hip.

My mission for 2012 is to get down and dirty with our emotional dualities in life, despair vs. faith, adversity vs. prosperity, gratitude vs. ungrateful, loneliness vs. content.

How do our human emotional polarities show up in your life and how do you "deal" with them?

Homework. The theme of so many of my clients’ and friend's life is total unexpected life turmoil, not oh my I have a hang nail turmoil but, life and death turmoil.

Being presented with either a total explosion and melt down of how thing were and awaking with a sense of how did this just happen?

Your assignment if you choose to accept it. Get down a dirty with one emotion for 15 minutes a day or every other day, using your journal or notebook letting your pen dance on your paper pick one emotion and dialogue with it. Then leave the writing for a bit and return and read what your heart wisdom’s has shared.

Look for peace today! Kristen

Green is the color of Kermit the frog, who sings the song “Its Not Easy Being Green.” Through his song, Kermit shares the plight of living life green, though not the eco friendly version. The approaching month of March, which is sprinkled with green in honor of St. Patrick’s Day, inspired me to contemplate the meaning of this color. Although Kermit doesn’t discuss this, green is also associated with the saying “I’m green with envy!!”

Envy: to lust after something someone else possesses. Well, that is how I define it. You can be envious of a physical attribute, wealth or status. But when you are in the throws of the fertility journey, the green monster of envy might rear its head against pregnant women or perhaps those who are pregnant a second or a third time while you are still in the process of trying to create your first child.

I remember “feeling green” one day, smack dab in the middle of a fertility cycle. I was minding my own business in the middle of “Tar Jay” (aka Target). When I looked up, all of a sudden I was surrounded by pregnant women. How in the world could there be so many of them in one store? A rush of panic swept over me. I felt flushed, but it could have been the hormones. But anyway, no matter what direction I looked, there was a round. full baby bump. I took a few deep breaths and then did what any other hormone-induced fertility cycling women would have done. I abandoned my cart, ran to my car and cried. Leaving without toilet paper, laundry detergent and deodorant only added insult to injury.

Driving home, I felt envious and sad, but mostly upset about my reaction. On that day it wasn’t easy being green, I typically wouldn’t have described myself as being the green with envy type, but when motherhood eluded me that emotion became familiar.

Dr Kiltz’s wisdom about envy came through one day when we were co-presenting at a workshop in Albany. “Isn’t that where you want to be?” he questioned as I retold my round baby belly story.
He asked this with passion.

Yes, was the answer from so many and then the “but” came in! The conversation turned to the emotional pain of disappointment that rushes in first, having a cause and effect of blocking the ability to visualize oneself full and round. That was the rebuttal, to recoil from the thought instead of embracing the energy of pregnancy.
Listening about how the green block of envy might be that of fear and pain furthered the discussion…

Here’s what I know now that I wish I knew then:
Self-compassion is loving oneself fully. It is loving yourself even when you’re having a green moment. It is normal and human to feel the sensation of envy and the flush wave of being green. One could describe envy as having both a shadow side and a light side of green. The hopefulness of your heart’s desire can compel you forward.

Green is the color of the heart chakra. It is a healing and uplifting feeling that is always present and embodied within, just waiting to be tapped into in a moment’s notice. Just like your breath, quietly filling and emptying, your amazing heart energy is there shimmering green, waiting to be accessed for healing and peace.

Compassion and self-love are moving with acceptance into a non judgment state, allowing yourself to feel the complete range of emotions. Your open heart, the green of envy and the green peace of will all bring you on a journey to motherhood through a deeper awareness of your beautiful uniqueness.

So here’s a suggestion. On those days when you are feeling “it is not easy being green,” give yourself full rights to a day of doing just that. Declare today you will be envious, scared, sad, bitchy and unpleasant!!!! And green!!! Look out world!!!

I can almost guarantee that this declaration will put a smile on your face and a giggle in your throat!!!! Declare it! Feel it!!! Embrace that shade of green in you.

After all. We all look great in green!!
Love and blessings to you.
Kristen Magnacca

Being good to yourself is creating a habit that becomes a practice, a philosophy of being.

Maya Angelou’s quote explains this concept perfectly: “If I am not good to myself, how can I expect anyone else to be good to me?”  The energy of giving to others and not to oneself creates a vacuum in the flow of conscience and unconscious energy patterns, both internal and external.  This creates an unbalance.

The month of February is known as the month of romance, which perhaps makes you immediately think of sharing yourself with another person through romantic love.

So often we women frantically try to make things come together to flow perfectly while forfeiting our needs to the needs of others.  It is the erosion of our needs, without an internal connection to self-love, that creates a sense of being half filled rather than feeling your cup runneth over.

It is foreign for women to think about themselves first. We are the nurturers and the home keepers not in the “housewives” sense but in being the creators of the home sacred space and the providers of a sense of familial connection.  We are hard wired to think about the whole unit and not just our singular being.

Ahh, but then comes the fertility speed bump.  The natural progression to motherhood is abruptly stopped or altered.  The flow is clogged and blocked, creating stress in the homeland and in yourself. So who you are? Reaching your heart desires might feel elusive.

Here’s what I have come to believe: You must hold and create the internal sense that you are fully supported and loved on this green earth and beyond. This takes the sting out of life’s challenges even if currently the future looks a certain way. You are no more disconnected from the birth right of creation then you are disconnected from the oxygen you breathe.

WOW!  That is a mouthful to swallow, but it will resonate on some level and bring deep peace in knowing that you’re really ok and there is a great abundance of all things for everyone and peace, love, creation for all.

Recently I was speaking at the RESOLVE of New England annual conference. In the middle of my presentation I said, “This is not about the baby!”   Immediately, one of the attendees tweeted that line out into the universe through waves of energy.

It is not about the baby! It is all about you and anchoring  yourself . It’s about believing that you are a powerful, peaceful and magnificent being of the universe who has the ability to create what you want!  Yes, what you want.  Are you ready?

So in this month of love, I beg you to love yourself first. Fill yourself up first. Embrace yourself, your body, your smile, your gifts, and your being. There is only one of you blessing this planet and all of us needs you.

Let’s talk again about Maya Angelou…. She says “I love to see a young girl go out and grab the world by the lapels. Life’s a bitch. You’ve got to go out and kick ass.”

Life can be challenging, so you need to take action by going out and knowing where you want to go and what you’re going for!!  Your pure intention of heart will do the “kick ass” part without any effort!

So get your game on, put on some red lipstick or high heels and be good to yourself first.  Then create!!!

Love and blessings to you.
Kristen Magnacca

January usually means starting off with the greatest of intention to make New Year's resolutions such as losing weight, stop smoking, taking a class or going to the gym more.

Whatever the "resolution" is, you begin the year with such high hopes and expectations and then, life happens. Those old patterns slip in and before you know it, it's February and the progress that you projected didn't go as you had intended.

I would like to offer you a different approach this year.  Instead of starting out 'gang busters' try this for the first week of the year.

Go Easy on yourself!  Take time to regroup from last year and the hectic holidays.

We need the gift of time.  It make sense to take a step back and re- learn about yourself, what you've learned, what you can let go of and what is in the process of re-birthing within yourself.

Divine timing is so important to our existence along with the understanding of the flow of life's cycles.

However, if you are ready to get going, the following question is simple and powerful and can get you moving in a creative direction. Sit for a while and answer this:
"If I had unlimited time, talent, money and support from my family and friends here is a list of things I will do over the next twelve months".

God bless you all as we move into 2012 with a focus on self-care, love and a peaceful heart.

Happy New Year,
Kristen